Bon appetit!

 I’ve had a sneaky suspicion lately that I might be a bit of a culinary genius. I took my first cooking class a few weeks back and stared in awe as the woman showed me how to…wait for it…chop an onion! Okay, so my genius might be in the developmental stages right now, but what it comes down to is that I love food. I know, it’s a pretty bold statement, but I’m not afraid to admit the fact that I absolutely love the taste, smell, and look of wonderful food.

I read an article that really made me think about my food obsessions. There is this new term floating around called “food porn”. Food porn includes those delectable pictures of an ooey, gooey, creamy and chocolatey dessert or that big, juicy, cheese-covered burger. See below:

 

When we look at these pictures, apparently our brain gets turned on and we want to eat. They say our brains are even more turned on by pictures than actual food in front of our salivating little faces! It all goes back to the cave man days they say, though I’m pretty sure the Neanderthals didn’t have food porn to browse on Pinterest.

I guess what I found so fascinating about this food porn idea is that I know now why looking up all of those recipes can be so addicting, I also now know why I’ve wanted to be one of those food photographers, (this article did not however explain why I want to be the person who squishes up make up samples and photographs those cool smudges and color combos). What still leaves me baffled, however, is this idea of a “foodie”. I consider a foodie one of those people that is obsessed with food, talks about it with big and usually French words, and makes you feel like the most you know about food is that French fries come from potatoes. I find these people to be kind of annoying.  

 I’m no foodie, but if I can turn this:

Into this:

I will still respond to the name Culinary Genius. Bon appetit!

The Man Must Have List

Alright, who is ready for the latest installment of my love life? Ha. I knew that’d get your attention. So it’s been about four months since the split which means  I’m nearing the six month timeline that all those helpful people told me would mean I was “okay”. I guess I can quote good old John Mayer when I say, “I’m in repair. I’m not together, but I’m getting there.” You see this starting over business is really difficult, but I feel that I’m now getting used to the idea of going on a date*gasp*.

Everyone says you’ll find Mr. Perfect because he’s right under your nose, but I’ll tell you what- I’ve looked there, and found nada. I’ve decided that as a starting point I would create a list of attributes that the next man in my life will have to have. 

The Man Must Have List

1.       Must have their shit together- My friend was trying to set me up with this guy and said, “He’s so nice, he’s getting ready to go back and finish school so he can start his own business.” There are so many things wrong with this sentence. I want no part of anyone going back to school, I did that six years ago. I already know what I want in my life, and I need someone who has their life together enough to say they have a job that they enjoy, they don’t rely on their parents for anything other than love, and they don’t have roommates that own kegs. Seriously, get your poop in a group.

2.       Must be caring- I am a natural caretaker. I’ve been caring since I was 8 and got in trouble for giving my money to homeless people on family vacations. I always try to be the person that people know they can go to for comfort. I need someone who will a. let me take care of them, but in return, b. take care of me. Now I know I’m an independent woman, but truly sometimes I do need help. And also for the record, I’m not going to be your mother.

3.       Must love baseball- It’s how I was raised, I love America’s favorite pastime. If your favorite sport is hockey, this isn’t going to go anywhere.

4.       Must be a democrat- Okay, now I know some of you are like whoa, that’s a strong statement. But you know what, I’m not afraid to say how I believe. I’m tired of everyone being like, “Oh, I’m an independent“ or  “I’m generally more conservative, I just don’t like labels.” Puh-lease. Say what your beliefs are and be proud of them. Besides I don’t want to be with someone who is against gay marriage, a woman’s right to choose, or healthcare reform anyway.

5.       Must have hobbies- It might be my undiagnosed ADHD, but I always have to be doing something. I like to learn new things, travel, cook, craft, shop, try new things, read, write, sing, and laugh. And the fact is, it’s way too easy to sit on the couch and never get up. Therefore, I need someone who also likes to do things because I want my life to be better, I don’t want to be complacent.

6.       Must have priorities- Everyone has things that are important to them, mine are: family, friends, health, and learning. I always say that I want to be the best version of me that I can be. If I’m with someone, they need to share these same values. I want to say I have a better half and know that I’m someone’s better half too.

Am I asking too much? I hope not. Mr. Right will come along, but in the meantime, only the men meeting the above qualifications need to apply.