Just a Perfect Blendship

I've been thinking about friendship a lot lately. I guess you could say that during my life-long quest to become a better human being, I've started to look at the people that I surround myself with. You see, friendship is much different when you are an adult than when you were a kid. The people you choose to maintain a relationship with must fight for space with work, significant others, family, alone time, and well...life. Therefore, it seems much easier than it used to be to "give up" on a friendship as opposed to when your interactions consisted of trading fruit snacks.

Before I start sounding too down on people, I should say that my friends are amazing. They are excellent for boosting self confidence, responding to stories in expected dramatic fashion, picking me up when I need help, and most importantly, making me laugh.
 Example 1
Me: Guess who texted me this weekend? The ex.
Group:What!?! OMG, what a loser, he obviously knows what he's missing! What did he say?!?
(I wish you could've seen their faces to understand just how funny this was.)

Example 2
Friend 1 comes out of the restroom: Do you guys just have that pair of underwear that is way too big and just sags on your butt? Then when you pull your pants on you have to like...rearrange?
Awkward pause...
Friend 2: Actually,  usually I have the opposite problem of pulling on my underwear and wondering how they got so tight and why I have so many fat rolls...

Example 3
Me: Okay, I'm going to say something now that I know I shouldn't say because it makes me a bad person, but I'm going to say it anyway, so please don't judge me.
Friend: I love when you start out stories this way!

Example 4
I get a daily dose of pins sent to me by my friend who lives far away. Even though we don't get to see each other often, she consistently makes my day. 

   

Yeah, what can I say? I've got some great friends. But anyways, my point is that I've been looking at people who I consider to be my true friends because I want to emulate the features of their friendship that I value. I know I look for people who are kind, honest, thoughtful, dependable, patient, and wonderfully sarcastic. No, I'm not writing an online dating profile, I'm talking about what I feel like we should all expect from one another. I don't think it is really that hard to be a good friend, but as I look at the people in my life I've noticed that there are quite a few that I've lost touch with. Why does this happen?
1. Their constant negativity made me negative
2. They were so involved in their own lives that I gave up trying to be a part of it (I'm being kind, really I mean they were selfish and egocentric)
3. They got in a relationship and lost all communication with the outer world
4. They yelled at me for standing up for another friend
5. They only wanted to be friends on their schedule
6. They only called me when they needed something
7. They made me feel like crap (so please stop texting me)

As I look at this list, I still feel like these are pretty legit reasons for giving up on a friendship. I also realize that at one time or another I was probably guilty of these things too. My hope is that I have learned to improve on these because I want to be remembered for the positive acts that I do in life. People think I'm crazy because I have a stockpile of birthday cards so that no one will ever feel unloved on their birthday, and I'll usually be the first to offer to you a ride, RSVP to your party, bring you ice cream because you are sad, or split the bill down the middle even if we didn't spend the same amount. I do these actions not because I want credit or because I'm secretly keeping score. I do them because I don't care about the little things like you didn't call me, or you left me out. I care about the big picture and knowing that I've created relationships that will help me through the best and worst times. My yoga teacher says we need to focus on how we will grow this spring and in what ways. My goal will be to grow new and old friendships- what will be yours?